Tomorrow you will be two years old. OMG, I cannot believe it. So here I am, working on your third letter, as promised, one per year, trying to squeeze it in while you are sleeping. This year, has been the year of joy for me. I have come to
the conclusion with your help, that you, your stability, your being, your routine, and needs, come first, and that above all else, nothing else matters. Instead of trying to make our life about schedules and how much we can get done
in a day, I enjoy you, my shadow, and embrace your eagerness, with slowed lessons of “helping” with laundry, lunch making, cleaning, groceries, learning, walks, school, phone calls, car rides, errands, and talking about anything and
everything under the sun. So we enjoy the day, at a slowed pace, taking everything that comes our way, head on.
1) “Becausea thing seems difficult for you, do not think it impossible.” –Marcus Aurelius. I’m not gonna lie, even since before you were born, the deck has been stacked against you, in one way or another. Status, birth, surgeries, growth, milestones, all these have been based, tracked, on what the “doctors” think an average is, as if you can truly gage a human’s accomplishments, or deduce an achievement to a statistic that labels you “under” or “average” or “over.” But you, you smile, you learn, you laugh your way through, and in my opinion you come out better and smarter than most.
2) “Tis better to live your own life imperfectly than to imitate someone else perfectly.” –Elizabeth Gilbert I want you to not be afraid to mess up, to know that it will happen, that failing is part of learning. Don’t compare yourself to others, because really, that is the only kind of failure you can commit in life-doing yourself the injustice of not being you. Follow your passion, your gut, your instincts. They won’t fail you. And I will be there, to help pick you up, brush you off, and try again-Always. No matter what. There is nothing you can’t do where I won’t love you.
3) “This is the greatest gift God can give to you:To understand what happened in your life. It is the peace you are searching for.” Mitch Albom It is natural for your soul to long for God, to want friends, to understand your purpose, all those are threaded together. So by doing the first, the rest will fall together. When you feel your soul thirsty, water it, and don’t put off the inevitable. Take care of what you can today, and God will fill you up, with something that people never can.
4) “Never forget that once upon a time; in an unguarded moment, you recognized yourself as a friend.” Elizabeth Gilbert. I think that what I have learned most in life, especially the past year, as my life has come down to a small scope of people that you have to be your own best friend, you have to be okay with yourself where you are in life, and if you can do that, you will never be scared at the times in life when you have to be alone. That you can face life, fears, troubles, without people, but also take comfort in knowing you are never alone. I am with
you, in your heart, always, and God will always be there for you.
5) “You know you are in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.” –Dr. Seuss. Love and hope is what makes life bearable. Always remember the stars have nothing on you, so reach for them, with people, dreams, opportunities. Fight for love always, never give up on, and remember, it is not always fairytales, more often than not, it is compromise, tears, and hard work, but oh so always worth it.
6) “Sometimes we have just one chance to change it, and then it is gone, and never comes
again.” –Billie Letts. Remember that life can change in an instant, as quick as the intake of a breath. We always
have meanness in us, but we have to let go of that, and hang onto each other, and the good in us, and that’s the only thing worth living for, always is the good. And we have to pass that on, and make the most of everyday, because, like
I said, things can change in an instant. So you have to make God the constant, and ride it out.
7) “I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind. Some come from ahead and some come from behind. But I’ve brought a big bat. I’m all ready you see, now my troubles are going to have troubles with me.” Dr. Seuss. Honestly, I think Seuss was a genius. With a few witty rhymes, he made life advice for more people, than most will ever realize. I cannot guarantee our life will ever be easy. Some troubles I can stop, some I cannot. And also know that I won’t always be able to help you, but I will try my hardest…always. Some can be solved with
money, some with a decision, all with prayer. I will always have a bat ready for you, to help you beat down what troubles we can, so that trouble will hate when it sees us at its back. And never, please never, feel like you are a
burden for us, or that you cause trouble. Because you are the furthest from that.
8) “Sometimes the questions are complicated, and the answers are simple.” Dr. Seuss. This, is
sometimes the epitome to the core of many of life’s ‘gray’ issues, or questions. You will face many questions, some appropriate, some not, most funny, some heartbreaking. I promise we will always try for the simple answer, but just remember, even if it does turn out to be simple, you may not like it. But you have to learn to accept it, and be okay with it. Whatever the answer is to whatever question you want to ask.
9) “To all the lost souls who have forgotten to believe in the immensity of love.” –One
Tree Hill. I loved this show, in highschool, and when I first started dating your dad and crazy enough, it is still on now, even when you are 2. I think mostly, if you let what you love do what it’s supposed to, it will heal you, help you not be bitter, and the thing that numbers measure can start to be used for things that matter, your heart, your words, your dreams, and all because you just chose to believe in the power of love, of what it can do for you.
10) “The rest of your life is a long time, and whether you know it or not, its being shaped right now. You can choose to blame your circumstances on fate, or bad luck, or bad choices, or you can fight back. Things aren’t always going to be fair, in the real world, that’s just the way it is, but for the most part, you get what you give. What’s worse, not getting what you wished for or getting it, and finding out it’s not enough? The rest of your life is being shaped right now with the dreams you chase, the choices you make, and the person you decide to be. The rest of your life is a long time, and it starts right now.” –One Tree Hill…so yeah, pretty self explanatory. It just covered so much, and I wanted you to hear it, know it, and follow it.
11) “Move forward, fall back, life’s like that.” –Show credit for a tv show called Mercy.Kind of a life motto. Sometimes your up, sometimes your down. But its life, so accept it, and instead of fighting it, make the best of it.
12) “If you’re out on the road, feeling lonely and so cold, All you gotta do is call my name, and I’ll be there on the next train.”-From the Gilmore Girls song credit. Funny, whenever you hear this song right now, you stop what you are doing, runto the tv and just gaze with your eyes open. You love this song. When you do this, I say “It’s your song.” And you get so excited and happy. And if you don't believe me, lol, I have it on video. But really, its true. Whenever you are sad or lonely, whether you live with me, or are a grown adult, I am always just a phone call away, or whenever needed, I will fly, travel, run, just to get to you. I love you. Everything I ever did or chose, lead me to you. Can’t argue with that.
So heres to a year of the 2’s. They say, its horrible, that you will give us hell. But really, so far, you just test your boundaries, and once you know they don’t change, you smile, stay within them, and are my handsome, singing, adoring shadow. Whom I would be lost without.
I love you always,
